Q.(2) My life is stressful. Help!
ANSWER by Dr Maddy
Many of us have days that are more stressful than others and can still cope pretty well. It is when we become overwhelmed for longer periods of time and then more stress is added that we need help. Page 76 of my book, Power Up For Success, discusses Health and Balance and how to diminish and cope with life’s stresses. You will also enjoy listening to my CD called Meditations In Light And Sound.
HEALTH AND BALANCE
Before you can create order, you must undo burnout. Your
outer world is a reflection of your inner one. Your desk, house, body, job
and relationships are as good as the inner workings of the self. When this
is in order, you will have the energy, stamina and enthusiasm to get the
best out of life.
Look on the bright side of your current situation. Having more things to do
than you think you could ever accomplish means you are alive, growing and
thriving.
The first thing to do is to get your body in good working
order. Reestablish healthful eating and exercise habits. Consume foods
that are
low in fat, salt and sugar, and high in complex carbohydrates:
fruits, vegetables, whole grains, pasta, potatoes-and plenty of water. If
you can, exercise for at least 30 minutes 3 times a week. Take a relaxing
walk. Fatigue is a result of acidic buildup of lactic acid in your body as
well as dehydration and the breakdown of body tissue. You are overdoing it
if you're very tired and your legs feel heavy. Don't exercise when you are
sick. When your body is fighting exhaustion and infection, exercise is
not what it needs.
To get to the balance that you want in life, take a step back from your life
and view it objectively. How important
are those "gottas" and "have to's?" Make a list of what you would do if you
had six months to live in perfect health. Take a close look at the
list because it represents the things in life that you presently value the
most. This will put your life into perspective as to how you are living and
how you really wish to live. Are they congruent? If not, what do you have to
add or eliminate to make it a reality?
The next step is gaining proportion in your life. A true sign of burnout is exaggerating your dilemmas. Shrink things back to normal size. List the major problems in your life (you are ten pounds overweight, relationship problems, mortgage payments, etc.) Envision the very worst that could result from these problems. Can you live with it? If so, accept the situation and try to modify it the best you can. Write down some steps you can take to correct it. If the situation is intolerable, devise a strategy to make it acceptable even if it means finding another course of action.
Next, list your priorities. Decide which goals need attention now, and which ones can wait. Look at your interests, skills and needs, as well as what you are trying to do with your life. These will also be deciding factors to concentrate on as these are the priorities that will help you reach your goals faster.
For balance, you need to divide your life into three categories: career,
relationships and personal growth. A fair share should be given to all three
areas. To make sure this happens, keep a calendar of events and mark all
personal events in red and mark career events in blue. A quick look at the
calendar will show you if balance prevails. Take a mental inventory of your
friends and put your energy into the people who are growing with you.
Otherwise you will feel an energy drain.
Stress and crisis are in everyone's life, however when you are in balance,
you don't lose your perspective. It's easy to keep things in proportion and
prioritizing is a natural process. You are more likely to be sociable and to
use your right brain creativity to solve problems. When you have high
self-esteem, you have a can-do attitude even if your schedule is booked.
Nothing seems overwhelming.
Go one step and one day at a time; focus on the NOW. With these strategies, balance becomes a way of life. Good health and less stress are yours!
